Peyton Manning Murders Tim Tebow


“I like taking teams that suck and making them not suck so much,” said Manning about his signing with the Broncos, “The Colts had to let me go, because they were about to be good without me.”
Peyton Manning signed with the Broncos, effectively ruining his career and murdering Tim Tebow (Not really. Not yet – at least).
“I’m pissed off,” Tebow said, “I intended to suck some more next season and somehow make the playoffs. I want to be traded, but man, God is great, right?” You heard it here first, folks: Tebow is pissed.
“Manning is a great acquisition for this team,” says John Fox, unknown head coach of Denver, “It makes my job easier and now I can party more next season instead of working.”

It might be hard to understand why Manning signed in Denver, but let’s loo at why Manning might have made this decision:
1.) Maybe Manning wants to be more religious and is hoping Tebow will take him to church.
2.) Maybe Manning likes having a defense that is terrible.
3.) Money. Obviously.
4.) He doesn’t want to win the Super Bowl again.

So as you can see, there are a lot of reasons Manning signed in Denver.
Here’s a photo to laugh at:

20120319-124741.jpg

Good luck, Peyton. You’re going to need it.

-Poke Czech

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